There is a movie you might never have seen called Take Me Home Tonight that came out in 2011, and it’s as ridiculous as it is entertaining. The entire movie is about a party that takes place in the 1980’s (as evidenced by the soundtrack, attire, vehicles, and the fact that the main character worked at Suncoast Video.) That should have been enough to tip me off, but instead I get teased mercilessly by my wife because I thought it was set in modern times and the characters were simply going to an ’80’s themed party. How should I have known? – I’m a ’90s kid!

It’s pretty hard to relate to time periods we never fully experienced. The ’80s aren’t a huge stretch from my decade, but when my older clients start telling me about life in the ’70s, the ’60s, and before, I really start to feel the distance. How am I supposed to build rapport with somebody when we have nothing in common?

First off, that’s not true. We do have things in common, but I’ll come back to that.

Soldiers and Mothers

The Baby Boomers are an impressive bunch for sure. You can’t spend much time in Final Expense Land and not run into folks that now live solely on social security, but that is not in any way representative of their whole story. They have been soldiers, breadwinners, working mothers, entrepreneurs, and survivors. They can remember not having the internet, not having cell phones, and maybe in some cases not even having electricity. Good things in life were not simply handed to them – they had to be earned through hard work and commitment. And no matter how hard it was, they stuck it out together.

Call me old-fashioned but I think there’s a lot to learn from our seniors. They certainly have more life experience than I do, and more than likely they’ve seen everything. (If you ask my 93-year-old grandma what she’s been through, buckle your seatbelt and maybe grab a snack because you’re going to be there awhile.) If you ask the right questions and keep an open mind, you’re bound to hear a different perspective from your own. You don’t have to always agree, but it’s never a bad idea to try to be better rounded.

Listen

Listening is a lost art in our culture, but ironically it’s the most desirable trait we value from other people. Seniors are no exception to that rule, and that right there is something we share in common. The clients we visit in the Final Expense market often just want to be heard and understood. Some may be more lonely than others, and some might be less open than others, but I promise you they will jump at the chance to talk to you about something. If you’re willing to set aside your agenda for a couple minutes and genuinely listen to your clients, you’ll uncover clues about what drives them, what worries them, and what matters to them. Making the pivot from there to the importance of life insurance shouldn’t be a difficult transition! But first you must listen.

Try on their Shoes

Put yourself in their shoes before you ever open your mouth. They lost their job to a younger and therefore cheaper employee… Their health has failed them and now they feel somewhat like an invalid… They could never afford a retirement fund or never learned how to pay the right amount in taxes, so now their social security income is barely enough to get by… Their kids and grandkids are busy and don’t come around often… The employer that they gave their whole career to has cut pensions/benefits for the retirees… Many of their family and closest friends have passed away… You don’t know their story until you ask. You may even start to see more in common with them than you thought was possible. One thing you can count on, though, is that when you slow down, spend some time, ask questions and just listen you will understand your client much better and they will feel understood. You will have successfully created trust and bridged the generation gap that so many young agents struggle to build.

Be careful, because you just might wind up with some unexpected life-long friends in the process.